When a team member consistently provides too much detail - a 10-minute touch base often expands into an hour-long energy-draining experience - they create a slowdown and can even play a role in diminishing the momentum of the team overall.
Of course, this isn’t the team member's intention.
More likely the team member is simply looking for reassurance.
So here’s five steps to support this team member while also making your communication experience together more enjoyable and efficient:
- Disrupt & Reassure: When someone starts getting “into the weeds,” disrupt them. Pause. Look them in the eye and say something along the lines of, “X, I know you work hard and that you’re competent as well as thoughtful in your work. While I know you want me to understand your process, I trust you and your decisions. (Pause) I don’t need all of this detail. All I need to know is ABC.” ABC could be the cost of a project. or a next step. Let them know in most cases you don’t need them explain or justify their choices or process.
- Come up with a Code Word: Have a word you two agree upon that you can use to kindly disrupt them when they’re going into the weeds.
- Provide an Analogy: Give them an analogy to hold on to – for example: if you request they provide a diabetic dessert, all you want for follow through is for them to tell you they baked a sugar free cake. You don’t need to know that they tried Stevia, honey, palm sugar, applesauce and all the trials and tribulations they went through to get to the right ingredient, with the right measurement, and which store they went to to find the ingredients or who they talked to to figure out the best recipe.
- Request High Level Context: If they need your help and want you to understand everything they’ve tried, tell them you appreciate high level context. In this case, “I made a sugar free cake and had to try four sugar free substitutes before I figured out what worked.”
- Use the Discussion Frame-Up: Ask them to use this Discussion Frame-Up Form BEFORE meeting with you - Discussion Frame-Up
Here's to creating more ease, momentum and velocity for your entire team!
